LORI DEKLEINE CANDLELIGHT VIGIL

Due to a snow storm in Indiana and southwestern Michigan on January 10, 2009, Laura, Jen and I were not able to attend Lori's candlelight vigil. Before Patti headed to Holland for the vigil, she called and asked me to write something regarding OIDV that she could read at her sister's vigil:

FROM: RENEE’ HARRINGTON, MICHIGAN OFFICER INVOLVED DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.

Laura, Jen and I from MIOIDV so wanted to be by Patti’s side today. I feel as though we are sending Patti, who is in the midst of the grief of losing her sister Lori to officer involved domestic violence, into un-chartered waters…which is exactly what OIDV is.

40% of police officer families experience domestic violence, compared to 10% in non-officer families. Officer involved domestic violence is more deadly than non-officer related domestic violence, and unfortunately the only time we hear of OIDV is AFTER a victim has been murdered, because their voices were silenced prior to their murders, for speaking out on the taboo subject of the abuses they suffered at the hands of a police officer.

To silence Lori, you silence her strength and her determination to escape her abuser. Lori was strong. Lori was determined. Lori was led by her integrity and her belief that irregardless of Ken’s position as a police officer, he did not have the right to violate her and violate Michigan’s domestic violence laws. Lori’s strength can be seen not only in her ability to survive Ken’s abuse, but also in her escape from Ken. With no one to turn to and no agency to assist her, Lori courageously in an essence took on Ken by her herself, when she said, “enough” and filed for a divorce.

Courageous. Strong. Determined. That is how Lori deserves to be remembered. With her last breath, Lori fought and was still fighting back against Ken, and the officer involved domestic violence that traps so many other victims. Lori took a stand when she filed for divorce and she took a stand when Ken was killing her. Lori never backed down. Courageous. Strong. Determined.

We owe it to Lori to continue to let her voice be heard…for it is the voice of every victim of officer involved domestic violence. The police officers, the prosecutor’s office, and the jurors who insured that Ken was held accountable for Lori’s murder, have already opened the doors on this taboo subject of officer involved domestic violence…they have given voice to Lori and officer involved dv.

And now it is up to all of us as to what we will do with this lesson that we have learned about officer involved domestic violence. Do we close that door of opportunity that the officers, prosecutor, jurors and media have given us…or do we pick up the phone and call our state legislators and demand officer involved domestic violence legislation and programs specifically for victims of officer involved dv?

We can either let Lori’s voice die with her…or we can let Lori’s voice be a battle cry to continue the fight that she so courageously began in January 2007.